15: I Have No Friends Being The Odd One Out And How I Overcame This

Show Notes

Episode 15: I have no friends being the odd one out and how I overcame this


I believe we can change the world, but first, we’ve got to stop living in fear of being judged for who we are.

Hi, I’m Genecia Alluora, founder of the number one leading female entrepreneur network in Southeast Asia supporting one million women to own and love the F-word. Being fabulous, having freedom, financial independence, and family. We’ve challenged women everywhere to stop talking themselves out of their dreams.

Soul why? Secrets of the Soul Rich Women Blueprint identifies the excuses to let go of, with behaviors to adapt and the skills to acquire on the path, growth, confidence, and believing in yourself to be recognized as a leader online, great clients online and to have more impact on the world.

Stop believing the lies about who you are, so you can become who you are meant to be, you are just an F-word away from the life you want, the marriage you want, the family that you want is going to be fueled by the business in life you build.

I have a free gift for you, “Secrets of Personal Branding” and “How do you Delegate Eighty Percent of Your To-Do List So That You Can Make Money Online While Focusing On Your Zone of Genius. Go to soulrichwoman.com. S-O-U-L-R-I-C-H-W-O-M-A-N dot com.   

Hi and Welcome to today’s episode, I wanna be sharing with you how, you know, at the beginning of my life, I didn’t have a lot of friends and was being the odd one out and how I overcame it to be who I am today, being confident, assured and knowing that I have the five people whom I want to hang out with the most, and well, first and foremost, I was supporting myself through school since I was fourteen years old, it was tough and because I was poor, I didn’t have a lot of money, I was not the same as the other person like the “mean girls” or “cool girls” who know how to make themselves beautiful, they know how to make themselves look good.

Whereas for me, I was the outcast, I was the opt one out because I had really short hair, really tomboy, I was hairy, I was ungroomed, I had bushy eyebrows, I had dark eyes circles and I look haggard, I already look old for my age because I didn’t know how to take good care of myself even though my mom take good care of me, it was because I had to support myself through school, I was stressed through school as well, constantly being bullied, kind of sums out the whole experience, and you know, of who I am.

So I was constantly being bullied and therefore I didn’t had lot of friends at school as well, so in school, being misplaced, I feel very isolated, so I don’t really talk to people, I just need to talk to my schoolmates, my classmates for talking purposes and that’s about it, and even though I served onboard as a, on choir, I was one of, I was, I couldn’t really remember was I soprano but I remember I was in choir, I was also in student council which like a prefect in school and didn’t, I was kind of like having good friends like guys, to me girls is like difficult to talk to and there’s so many rip between the lines, and I’m just so straight forward as a person that I find it very difficult to communicate with girls right, so because of the bitchiness and being constantly ostracized, backstabbed and bullied by the girls, even more, I didn’t want to have girl friends, I want to have just guy friends and even I had really good girl friends, my girl friends even up to today they’re still, we are still friends, okay, and she is also a very straightforward person, don’t really like to gossip, just want to hang out, you know, serve positive vibes, right. So we kind of like to attract the same people.

So I did feel very depressed when I was in school, whether was in Secondary School, I went to Junior College and then I didn’t do well in school, and then I continued to Polytechnic to do my occupational therapy diploma and I was still constantly facing that, kind of like not being accepted.

I still remember there was one incident besides bullying in Secondary School, let me bring you forward to even when I was in Polytechnic which kind of, I find it very weird because there was this girl who also felt, I didn’t do well because I was busy making money in, I mean, doing part-time work when I was in Poly and because I, as I said, I need to support my own education, so besides school, I was, I need to work outside of school, I was very tired and constantly, you know, busy with life, right?

So, there was this girl who failed her school subject, one of the key topics that we need to pass in order to graduate to the next level which is the third year of final year, and me and her both failed the same subject in this key to being graduated, right? In the end, the lecturer, kind of retain her and depromoted me even though I failed that subject matter, and when I went to the next level, the third year, everybody was, even more, ostracizing me and simply because I was just different because everyone was just the doing like school only and I’m like the only one juggling school and so many other things, so when I asked the lecturer why they didn’t promote the other girl and why they promoted me, they did share with me that they saw potential in me, they knew that I had to support myself through school, they knew that I was going through a tough time and they saw the potential in me, the believed in me that I didn’t fail because I’m, I wasn’t good academically, I mean academically but because of me being really hard work on the outside, you know, doing my part time jobs, things like that, so they said that “if you were to focus and bring your time back to school, you’ll be able to do well” with flying colors.

And true enough in the third year, I kind of put my foot down and say “okay, I’m gonna take on less part-time jobs and teach less outside of school and put all my time back to school to do more of the subject, I had to do extra twelve assignments in that semester, twelve assignments which mean as you know, writing a lot of, doing a lot of writing and research at the same time, so everyone was doing x number of subjects and I was doing one because the one I failed and because of that, I had to kind of do less kind of my work and kind of being put on more of my thoughts and my work and effort into that assignment.

And in the end, I will say I come out okay and facing all the people didn’t like me and say bad things about me and say that “you know Genecia should not have been promoted, she should have been demoted, you know being technical level because she didn’t do well, she’s always busy of life” and all these things, but you see sometimes when there are people who don’t believe in you, and people whom always think that you’re opt one out, there will be always other mentors or people at a high level looking at you and saying that “actually, you have the potential, you have the power to overcome and go to the next level, and I am so glad that my lecturers, at that point, they believed in me and gave me the chance and knowing that it was so tough for me to you know, balance between school and work and because they believed in me and gave me the opportunity to go to the next level, the third year, I told myself “I’m gonna work hard very hard and I wanna be a role model to many other people out there whom, you know, never giving up and knowing that failure in not an option”.

So, fast forward today, is I set myself a mindset that you know, it’s not the number of friends you have but the quantity of the people around you, you are the average of the five people that you hang out with the most, who are you spending the time with.

And you know, there are people whom are nail says layers and dreams layers out there and they are there to put you down, they are there to make fun of you, they are there to pull you back whenever you walk five steps forward and then they pull you ten steps back and you have to start building and try walking all over again like climbing out of a well knowing that you know that life outside the well, you know deep inside the well, nothing's gonna change your life, but by climbing out of the well, you know for sure that you will be able to have the better life to see a different perspective and to see a different light, so I make a conscious effort of whom I spend my time with and I’m very aware not to give my time out consciously to people who I think not important and focus on people who matters to me and that is my family, and that would be my business partners and that will mean my direct partners whom I’m working with, so that you know, the women in the community is Soul Rich Woman and by doing so, allow me to maximize my hours and my time to be able to give to them because my vision is to empower and equip one thousand, one million, millions of women out there to own and love the F-word and being the opt one out is never easy because people made thing that we are not good for them it’s just because we are vibrating that irritates their demons that within them.

Yeah, you know, so be it, let’s continue to vibrate at the highest possible level and higher possible energy, so that we send good vibes and attract the highest possible people around us and I’m glad that today I got to hang out with Elena Cardone (wife of Grant Cardone), I got to hang out with Garry Vaynerchuck, Sheryl Sandberg, Mary Buffet and so many more great people out there because when you truly open up your minds and you decide it, it’s okay to be the opt one out, it’s okay to vibrate in a way, at the highest energy level to attract and light mind up people into your life that’s when you know, your life is gonna be transform, your life is gonna be different, you are the average of the five people that you hang out with the most.   

Quality of friends super seeds the number of friends who you hang out with, with determination where you go towards, so I’ll like to encourage you today, who do you hang out with today? Are you living the life you want? If you’re not, then do something about it. If you don’t weed out the wrong people from your life, the good ones will never come.

So keep shining, I hope the story inspired you. I cried a little, I just felt so many emotions and I’m, as I’m sharing with you, I’m also letting go.

And I hope to speak to you and share with you more in the next episode. 

Thank you for joining me today. I’ll love for you to connect with me on LinkedIn, Facebook or Instagram and share with me your thoughts on this episode at Genecia Alluora. G-E-N-E-C-I-A A-L-L-U-O-R-A. Automatedly, you can send me an e-mail at hello@soulrichwomen.com. H-E-L-L-O at S-O-U-L-R-I-C-H-W-O-M-E-N dot com. I have a free gift fo you on our website; “Secrets of Branding'' and also “How Do You Delegate Eighty Percent of  Your To-Do-List To Your Assistant, So That You Can Make Money Online and Focus on Your Zone of Genius” and that is available at soulrichwomen.com. S-O-U-L-R-I-C-H-W-O-M-E-N dot com. Join the number one leading female entrepreneur network in Southeast Asia connecting more than two hundred thousand women across the region. 

Be a Soul Rich Woman. Dream to Shine. Woman Leader. Leader Activated. Alone we are strong, together we are unstoppable.                

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